Who wears short shorts? Who wears fat shorts?
One year ago, I got married in Las Vegas and one year ago, I packed on five to 10 pounds that I've been battling to get off for the past 12 months. Once my wedding was over, I relaxed a little on the strict intake of food and let up a little on the workouts. Why is it so god dang hard to lose five pounds? It's five teeny, tiny pounds. U.S. golden boy Michael Phelps can lose five pounds by breathing, Mr. Buff Pants Barack Obama probably can lose five in one of his six times a week 45-minute workouts and celebrities hire a personal trainer for one day and lose all 37 pregnancy pounds in one workout. But that's not real life is it? Sarah Crosbie is real life and I'm here to tell you that five pounds is freakin' killing me and I'm pretty tight-ass about what I eat - I only eat whole wheat and whole grain products, eat loads of lean protein, stay away from sweets, etc. Yawn. I bore myself thinking about it. That's why I have a new tool in my drop-the-last-five-pounds toolkit: skin-tight running shorts that make my butt look ass-some. They fit, but they show every lump, bump and chunk. I bought them for 50% off when our Reebok store was having a moving sale and I thought they'd look good one day. (Yes, I know you're never supposed to buy something that doesn't fit, but I did.) I wore them to the gym last night and they looked bad. I looked at myself in the mirror and thought "oh gross" but they worked. I worked hard on the stair climber. Then I climbed hills on the treadmill and then I did interval training on the bike. There's a little song Dorey the fish sings in Finding Nemo. When she's scared and she's swimming deeper and deeper into the dark abyss with Marlin, she sings: "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming." Yesterday, with my too-tight shorts, I kept singing: "Just keep going, just keep going, just keep going, your shorts are too tight." So, I've made it basically through the Christmas indulgence period and now me and my tight shorts are hitting the gym. Am I going to finally lose those last five pounds? Assolutely.
There might be more(or not)
Labels: butt, food, short shorts, weight
There might be more(or not)








